Sometimes my anorexia gets me to the point that I don't know anymore if I actually like a food or not. I get so comfortable with my so-called "safe foods" that I am not sure if I actually like them or if they are just comfortable.
In some cases, it's obvious. Of course I like real chocolate sauce more than the sugar free one. Normal cookies taste better than protein cookies. I know that the latter ones just feel safer, nothing else.
But almond milk is peculiar case for me. I know that it is literally just five almonds blended in water that pretend to be milk, but it would be more accurate to just call it milky almond water. But I think... I like it?
Anyway, we are here to figure this out. I got very comfortable with my almond milk. I use nothing else for my coffees and protein shakes, to the point that local supermarket sends me discount codes for more almond milk every week since they noticed too that I go through 5 litres a week.
But I think I really like the other ones, too. They are just ... scary.
The other reason this weeks challenge is milk based rather than food based, it because my body is giving me a hard time. I've been having heart palpitations pretty frequently and they seem to be set off by certain foods (high sugar, processed carbs, high fat). Until my heart calms down, I am reluctant to give my body more new foods. At least not without medical supervision. Otherwise, it would have been pasta this week (got lentil pasta, whole wheat pasta and protein pasta ready to go!)
1. Normal Milk
I don't usually drink normal cow's milk. But my flatmate left an open liter behind before going on holiday and I believe that throwing it out does the cows more injustice than simply drinking it.
I present iced coffee with coffee ice cubes. If you think I am an idiot to make this when having heart palpitations, you are correct.
(The joke is that my heart sometimes slows down when I drink coffee. Coffee constricts veins and probably elevates my blood pressure, which means my heart has to compensate less.)
2. Rice Milk
Making my protein shake with rice milk was a lot scarier than anticipated. Even though technically lower in calories, this feels more challenging than the
wraps of the previous week. I guess something about liquid calories still doesn't compute properly with my brain. Especially not that I will have to repeat this another 4 times in order to finish the entire liter of rice milk.
On a different note, my heart has been slightly better today. It fell into the 50-60s bpm while sleeping instead of 80-90 when I am experiencing palpitations. I spent the past two days stimulating my vagus nerve with cold peas to my forehead and aspirin when experiencing chest pain (recommendation from a friend who is a medic, but not a doctor, so don't take my word for it that this is the right course of action).
Lucky for me this worked somewhat, although I got some mild heart racing from eating breakfast this morning. My guess is that my body didn't take the sugar from an overripe banana too well. I really need a dietitian (still on the waiting list).
How are marshmallows less scary than the rice milk in this hot chocolate? - and other unanswered questions on today's episode of Mysteries of the World.
3. Coconut Milk
I started by baking brownies with this milk. They were so fucking dry that I basically have to dip them in milk. If that isn't a win in a way, I don't know.
Also, as taste test goes, I really like coconut milk. I even feel strong enough that I think I can go out tomorrow and buy more of it.
As you can see by the full drawer, I am starting to have fun with this. I liked the coco drink so much, I bought more of it. The pea milk is the green one. It is just new in the shops and I have never heard of it.
It tastes a lot like soy milk, both are made from legumes so I guess that makes sense. Pea milk is a protein bomb and I really like it. I think it will join my list of drink I am going to continue buying.
5. Soy milk
I have had soy milk in the past but I have fallen out of the habit of consuming it. Now I remember why: The solids separate when mixed with hot coffee because of the acidity levels in the drink. Gross. I have to make cold drinks with it I guess (it works when you let the coffee cool down as above).
It's funny: So initially I had a valid reason not to consume it anymore, but I forgot that reason and over time it turned into a food fear. Eating disorders are sneaky.
6. Oat Milk
I've been putting off oat milk for a while because I find it scary as fuck. A friend recommended to me to mix it with almond milk because apparently that tastes very good and would be less scary, but I want to at least try a full glass.
I ended up using mostly for cooking and making oatmeal. Too anxiety inducing.
7. Cashew Milk
Chia seed pudding with Cashew Milk is top.
8. Hazelnut Milk
Forgot to take a picture but probably one of my favorites. Can't get enough of the strong hazelnut flavor
9. Bonus: Plant milk made from pea and chicory root
Conclusion
I am now feeling comfortable adding coconut, hazelnut, Wonda, and Cashew to my shopping list. This challenge was hard, not gonna lie. There were times when I just stopped in between and had to encourage myself to keep going. There are even more plant milks I could try, but for now I had to stop. Unfortunately, my confidence with the challenges has tanked a little bit. I am still comfortable with these milks, but I don't feel like trying something new at the moment. Hopefully soonish I will be able to pick something up again.
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